Thursday, April 29, 2010

ME.



DEAR FRIENDS
I FEEL
LIFE
I AM LIVING
PROOF
I AM STRONG
STRONGER
THAN I EVER WANTED TO BE
I LIVE WITH PASSION
BUT
I’M SURPRISINGLY CALM
I’VE FELT PAIN
BEFORE
IT BURNS LIKE CINDER
SMOLDERING
BURSTING TO FLAMES
WITH A SINGLE BREATH
SPREADING
LIKE WILDFIRE
IT SCORCHES MY HEART
BLACKENS MY THOUGHTS
TEARS FILL MY EYES
SPILLING
DOWN MY FACE
LIKE RAIN
COOLING RAIN
MY HEART STILL BEATS
MY THOUGHTS
FLOW
I LIVE
LIFE
I AM LIVING
PROOF
I AM STRONG
STRONGER
THAN I EVER WANTED TO BE.
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Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Friends Time Out.



Priyal ... Sarcasm + Fun + Not more than 3 jokes on me in a day!



Abbu and Babbu ... Crazy + Bums !



Smoke .... its for the wise ...



Abhay ... My mate ... Most innocent pic of him ... I love it !



We walk .... discover ... mark ... sit around ... have fun !!!



... and climb trees too !



Then we decide to diet and not eat the road side kachra and NO R&B ... but ... we then sit at CCD ...



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Monday, April 5, 2010

Lullaby.




Draped in pallor.
Excruciating stillness.
Perturbing pincers.
Orating numbness.
Eyes un-numbed.
Frozen lips of happiness.
Lying in bowels,
of acute psychosis.
Gaze into the night.
Ruffling wind explains.
Screams are futile.
Silence is yet unheard.
Aching novelties.
Wandering redness.
Tears form maroon.
Drops in wilderness.
Sleep now son...
Wake in nothingness!
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You will Come Back too ...




A touched feeling.
A forgotten past.
Well woven in words.
Art of past.
Love and hatred in pain and stair.
We shared it all.
And yet you donno.
A heart of emotion and,
Thoughts of Love.
Friendship knows no bounds.
Yet...
An empty stairway and,
A broken window...
The day you understand this,
You will come back too...
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To Live.



Its night time and im out the door into the night after a long day
bent over the drawing table. Running across the wet grass and staring
up at a night sky full of stars. This is one of those nights that there
are so many stars in the sky that you feel like you can see the whole
universe, all the way to the end, and i almost lose my balance.

And now im weightless. breath a white puff.
This is that moment i live for.
this is that moment that is being alive.
the height of the swing, and the sick feeling in my stomach
just before gravity and chains catch me.
to stare at the stars atop a mountain as the clouds rush 30 feet overhead
at impossible speed
to jump across a gap between buildings, and look down 6 stories at the
street below as you glide over it.
the sad feeling in your heart, after a great book, or movie.
to lay in a bed of strange plants laughing with friends at the worst joke
youve ever heard, but you cant stop laughing.
to see an animal take its last breath.
to finish drawing a story that took you months to complete.
to have your hands pulled into warm pockets on a cold night, fingers entwined.
to see a paper plane you just made get caught in the wind and fly up 200 yards
and out of sight down to the end of the street into infinity.

its like life slapping me in the face and wrapping around me
flowing through every part of me and everything around me.

Tonight on the swings i climb to the top and sit on the crossbar of the
whole set, 12 feet high.
i pull the swing up and wrap the chain around my neck, then lower myself
hanging by my freezing hands.
Im getting scared and the metal is so cold i start slipping.
this is stupid. i dont want this..
i dont want to die yet.. there was something i needed to do...

i needed to say something to someone. one word

not yet. and im scraping at the chain at my neck with one hand, while
the other numb hand is slowly sliding free from the crossbar. dont die yet.


suddenly im in a dark room, and i can hear what is supposed to be my mother
on the other side of the door. shes saying something so faint i can hardly
make out the words.. its my name. its 2:32am. shes saying not to die.
shes telling me i dont have to die.
there is a pile of puke in the corner opposite me and tears are running hot
down my face.

I feel hands holding me up under my feet as i work out of the swing-chain-noose.
a second later i fall to the sand below and collapse onto my side, breathing heavy
white explosions in front of my mouth against a sea of stars.
im alive.. and for a second.. its all that matters.
walking home, jumping in the parking lot.. dancing for a passing car.
jump into a bush, balance across the back of a bench. and im smiling
just like when i went to bed last night.

and outside the door to my room, under millions of stars
i cant say that one word.
that word hasnt been invented yet.
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Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Marvel Create Your Own Superhero | Make Avatars with Iron Man, Hulk, Spider-Man, Thor, Thing, Wolverine, and more Marvel Characters | Marvel.com

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Saturday, September 12, 2009

Comeon Man ... !

people...
we are all gonna die,
its a fucking joke!
its just... enjoy life!
I mean... everything is screwed
and I can't stand people that take themselves super-serious!
A lot of people suck!
A lot of situation suck!
A lot of things in general suck!
But as long as you can find the good...
get rid of the bad...
enjoy life as much as possible till its snuffed outta you...
then I think your doing a pretty good job

:D
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Monday, September 7, 2009

Joblessly Me !!!

well ...
the story to tell ...
life is going good ...
after all i found my new hood ...
assignments , friends and drama ...
all include my good and bad karma ...
permission granted bunks ...
games without dunks ...
ex hommies visiting ....
or just hangging around and sitting ...
the only thing ammis ...
should be one of those old good night kiss ...
but hes go a new girl ...
around who he can curl ...
and a new friend ...
he can call at the night's bend ...
she loves him a lot ...
he gave her too much hope filled in a pot ...
hahahah ...
ok ... i donno what more to rhyme ...
poor poor esha !!!
whateva ...
i'm going off to call a pal !!!!
tha tha !!!
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Sunday, August 23, 2009

Happy wala Birthday Little Bundle of Joy!!!

Little ...

I know I am being the dumbest pals you ever had!
Not just that I haven't wished you as yet (though there is just a few hours left for your 'special day' to end) I haven't even saved cash to get you a gift!!! :'(

So here is my Shameless Wishes !!! ...



Blow these candles ... When all are out your happiness will end !!! (:P its a picture ... you never gonna manage to blow even one out!) ... Make a wish! (preferably that I get a rechargable set of batteries.) ... Love me ... Cause I love you even more! Wow I'm gay! Anything for my Little (Bitchu) !!! Hahahaha ...

Now stop scratching your bum and call me ... Muah !!!

Love you Api Little !!! ;)

~ Happy



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Friday, August 21, 2009

The Edge of Nowhere.

[Warning] Some of the characters in this story are character-less.Their names have been changed to maintain their confidentiality (Though they dont know what the damn thing is). Any resemblance to any person living or dead is not merely a co-incidence but a well planned accident.


8th August 2009

Swine Flu hits mumbai after a long time and is all over the paper like a hot celebrity!!!
Government declares holiday till the 21st to all schools and colleges in mumbai!
Yippppppiiiieeeee!!!

(On call...)
Happy: Hey! Wasap?
Crazy: Nothing yaar! Tu kya kar rahi hai?
Happy: Kya karu ... pak raha hai ... Tu school aa raha hai? Milthe hai!
Crazy: Tamma Tamma ... Chal milthe hai!
(So saying we manage to get the other 4 of the gang too and land up in school and spend the day in some faltu timepass)

After a mini-not-so-intresting vacation we all go to school again!

20th August 2009

(In class...)
The random bitching of the seniors and the politics behind the GS-UR-LR elections was on between the 7 out of 75 students present!
Happy: I got an event at Umang.
Madz: We all will come re ... OTSC bann sakthe hai na?
Happy: Haan yaar ... All of us will be from JJ's so the winner will have to be among us only :P
Madz: Cool!
Pri: I'm in too...

On the pretext of Umang event we leave class at 10am thought the event is at 4:15pm !!!

Madz: Kaminey dekhthe hai!!!
Happy: huh? Ok ...
Pri: Regel mein dekhthe hai!!!
Madz: But Crazy is not here ...
Wish: Call him naa ...
(number of calls were made to Crazy who didn't reply... Duffer was snoozing to glory!)
As plans where set we went to the theater and found its not playing the movie ... After a walk around ... a few mad lines ... a burger and milkshake at Mac's we reached the decided theater and bought tickets ... Crazy graces the theater with his presence 5 mins late!

Kaminey: Great cinematography. Good movie. Different story line. Like the comedy in such serious situations. Love Bopya!

Then the bunch of 5 went to the lonely school ... empty and isolated as the holiday continued as none of the students decided to come back on allotted date! We sat in a cozy corner and discussed ... and debated ... and sweared ... and tamma tamma! We revolted among our self about how we didn't want Rudyard Kipling's Birthplace to remain as it is and not be converted into a museum, how we didn't want a 5 floored modern building on our grounds, how Naturam Ghodse was right, How dumb some so-considered-great people where, blah blah ...
Retreated home at 6pm finally.

End of the day ... I did have fun ... But I didn't end up going for Umang where I registered to go! Should I have gone?

21st August 2009

*yaaaawnnnnnn*
I raise my head a little from my pillow to check outta my window ... Shit! Its pouring! Chuck it! I'm not going to school!
Aah! Forget ... I'll go ...
Little did I know that I'd meet all my Crack pals and have a fantablous time at that time ...

I reach VT at 10am ... Instead of going to JJ's I walk to Xaviers ... Warmly greeted by Mel ! Later to be joined by Beps and Kash! And of course Bep's guy Chirvy was there too !!! And again The gang goes to Mac's ... This time ... It was major fun ... Catching up with these guys after like 2 years !!! Crap talk ... Silly prodding ... Pulling legs ... chair fight ... funny photos !!!

I go back to Xav's to meet my Little-Bundle-of-Joy (because of whom I am even making this blog!)! Well not really interesting ... As she was busy practicing and I could get to talk to her for only 1/2 an hour !!! In which we were catching up and then suddenly she went ...

Little: I'm such a Bitch man!
Happy: huh? what? why so?
Little: Errrr.... I'm ashamed even to think about it ...
Happy: yea! Go ahead ...
Little: I can't stick to one guy long ... Not met the person who is not mediocre and is my level ...
Happy: Hahahahahhahahah... (OK i'm supposed to be serious.)
Little: hhehehehe ... No man ... I wouldn't be dating Ash if he was well now ... Its just because he is sick ... I have to prolong this ...
Happy: (I can't help not laugh here... She is soooo cute!) Arre ...
Little: He gets into my space man ... I don't need to all him all the time and tell him all I'm doing ... I need my space ... He seemingly caught me checking out another guy and went all emo!
Happy: Why the hell did you show him your checking out another guy? Argh!
Little: Arabs are hot!
Happy: ahhhahahahah ...

Her dance group called her for practice and so we had to cut short there!

I've been wondering ...
Like her ... And me ... And many others ... We can't really stick to people below our level ... And we even take time to realise that the person is not par us ... So ... Are we really being Bitches/Bastards? I mean ... Whats the harm in trying? You like something in someone and you'll hate something else! I can't really believe in the concept of "perfect match"! Things usually have a way of sorting themselves out.

Considering guys, it happens most of the time. Far too many men believe that the ultimate test of manhood is their performance in bed, and that they have to ace it every time.Truth be told,the pressure on en has never been greater than it is today. Battery-operated devices have unfair advantage these days. It's not a leveled playground anymore!Boys do cry sometimes. Lets be honest here: today, when girls/women are asking for dil-do they are not speaking in Hindi and are definitely not asking for your heart!

Sometimes, I feel that the desire to love outweighs the desire to be loved. Thats has to be the reason why so often, we continue to love those who don't deserve to be loved. It helps us feel emotinally employed. "Amour" becomes a career, a vacation. So, we continue to draw from our depleting inner reserves while steadily moving towards emotional bankruptcy.

Ok. All this is leading no where ... Its 1:37am ... night Night ...

:|





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